A man, his radio, and a long drive home (Ryan Blog Excerpt)

**Note--Ryan had come out from California to visit me this weekend...yes, just a week after we first met..and we had a good time, and went to the Visitors Center to watch the Joseph Smith movie. On the way out to the car, Ryan asked if he could hold my hand. And for those brief 30 seconds that we were holding hands, he (and I) was on top of the clouds. This email below came after his drive home that weekend. He wrote it using names of songs (you'll probably recognize a few). See if you notice any references to a certain "girl". (and I don't mean the drunk girl in the beginning :)...I know I sure did when I read it! And I knew EXACTLY who he was talking about! As a girl, I loved this blog! :)** PAM

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

I was getting ready to drive out when I saw a Drunk Girl standing there with an Umbrella. I admit that she startled me and I might have squeaked like a girl, I'm not sure. She told me that she could be my Girlfriend. WEIRD! I realized she couldn't help herself. After all, when I wear my glasses I look just like Buddy Holly, and who can resist a guy standing In The Garage? I told her, "Look weirdy, I don't know you and quite frankly I don't want to. I am heading Back Home. So I am just gonna get in my car and Drive Away ok?" Awkward! So I left driving down the Boulevard of Broken Dreams. I'm sure she'll be fine because Big Girls Don't Cry.

I decided I better grab something to eat so I could Maintain Conciousness. So I stopped and had Breakfast At Tiffany's. It was a fabulous diner, their cheesecake is The Sweetness because in The Middle it has The White Stuff that is just to die for! Thnks Fr Th Mmrs! With food in my tummy, I figured I had better hit the road and get myself home. Of course, I did get a little lost, and I really wished I had a map with me for the ride, oh well, I had to do it By Myself.

Traffic wasn't too bad in Phoenix. Of course, there was this one guy that kept bugging me! He was driving a Big Yellow Taxi and kept tailgating me, and everytime I would get over, he would just follow me into the same lane. He was a real American Idiot! Just when I thought that I Can't Take It, he finally passed me and I noticed his goofy little bumper sticker that said, "Everything You Know Is Wrong". I thought to myself, "Dude, you're a Basket Case! You need to Change Your Mind!" I'll Leave Out All The Rest.

Anyone who has driven from Phoenix to L.A. along I-10 knows there is this long stretch of road that is perfectly straight for like a bazillion miles and there is nothing but desert, and the road is usually pretty open. It was about this time that I hit that part of the drive. I started thinking about All The Small Things. How I met this Girl At The Rock Show, and our First Date. It was awesome! Whenever she's around it's Another Perfect Day. Uh Oh, it sounds like we have a Man Overboard!

I was glad that Al was willing to come along with me and keep me company on this Night Drive. We talked about all the important issues-- Which Backstreet Boy is Gay, Darth Maul, and how It's All About The Pentiums. He told me this long and boring story of how he was Trapped In The Drive-Thru... I wanted to die! He made up for it by showing me this Alf alarm clock that he had bought on Ebay. Then we joked about how we were White and Nerdy.

Finally, I could see it! California! The weather was nice with a High of 75. At the border, they welcomed me with 99 Red Balloons and one Black Balloon. I was greeted by The Black Parade which was lead by Helena, She's A Rebel. I stopped and thought I could check out all the Lights and Sounds. In the parade I saw Miss America, St. Jimmy, and Superman. Then I saw Stacy's Mom! She really did have it goin' on. It was pretty cool. I filled up, said goodbye to everyone and set out on my way again.

By the time I reached Indio, traffic was pretty backed up around Ocean Avenue. There was a Head On Collision involving Clark Gable and Whatsername... it was pretty bad and I thought I could just sit, maybe sleep since nothing was moving. I rolled down my window and yelled to the guy next to me, "Hey, will you Wake Me Up When September Ends?" He said he would, so I sat there and zoned out for a little bit. Again, I thought about the Girl All The Bad Guys Want.

I was almost home! It had been a long drive. But I made it without any harm or incident :) I cranked up H! Vltg3 and rolled into Riverside like an All Star because it Doesn't Remind Me of anything. Not to mention it's fun to Be Yourself. It was a good Holiday. Not to mention, I learned How To Save A Life. Not too shabby if I do say so myself.